Remember when you couldn’t wait for school recess? To burst out of the building with the anticipation of freedom from routine, to play and be silly with your friends?
This is a reminder that play isn’t just for children. In fact, play—self-chosen and self-directed (no one is telling you what to do or how to do it)—is as important for grownups, and the benefits can be profound.
Adventurous, free play is critical to a child’s development. It teaches them to interact socially and be empathetic, to think creatively, solve problems and develop physically. They learn to collaborate, deal with their feelings and with conflict. It’s a physical, emotional and social necessity.
And then we grow up.
But that doesn’t mean we don’t need the benefits of play. In fact, as adults we may need opportunities to be lighthearted and silly more, because play has been replaced by responsibility—to school and careers, to our families and communities—and stress.
Studies show that playing with others brings benefits:
• An enhanced sense of well-being. We laugh more, relax more, bond more.
• Better physical health from unstructured exercise like throwing a frisbee, going camping or to the pitch and putt.
• Stronger mental health from being engaged with and more connected to others.
Play as Intention
When you’re a child, play is spontaneous. Show up at the park, schoolyard or a play date and it just happens.
As grownups, so many other things vie for our time and attention, so we must be intentional and willing to have fun and be silly. Now it’s about making a plan to leave the concerns of the day behind, to just enjoy being with someone else and the activity you do together.
A State of Mind
In his book Play: How It Shapes the Brain, Opens the Imagination and Invigorates the Soul, Dr. Stuart Brown defines play as a “state of mind that one has when absorbed in an activity that provides enjoyment and a suspension of sense of time.”
Brown founded the non-profit organization Institute for Play, created to scientifically study and advance our understanding and application of play, and how it can lead to healthier, happier lives—and the consequences if we don’t play.
Your Play Personality
Because many of us have forgotten how to play, Brown suggests starting by identifying your play personality and then thinking about what kind of activity would appeal to you.
- A Collector enjoys finding or building collections. Join a group of like-minded people who share your passion.
- A Competitor enjoys playing (and winning) games with specific rules. Try joining a sports league to play with others. Invite friends over for a regular games night.
- A Creator or Artist finds joy in making or mending things. Take a class or teach what you know to others, or invite friends to join you for a class or craft night.
- A Director enjoys planning and directing. Volunteer for a community theatre group, help a local sports team or organize a community event.
- An Explorer plays by discovering something new, either physically (in a new place) or mentally. Sign up for a group tour or take a class in a new subject that interests you.
- A Joker enjoys being silly and foolish. Try improv theatre or take a stand-up comedy class.
- A Kinesthete enjoys moving their body. Join a dance class or a circus skills workshop, or fly kites.
- A Storyteller plays by listening to or creating stories. Join a writing, poetry or theatre group.
Think about what you enjoyed doing as a child.
• What made you feel excited and free?
• What were you doing when you completely lost track of time?
• When was the last time you did those things?
Up the Ante
Do something playful when you get together with friends
- Play outdoor games at a barbecue. Rent a grown-up bouncy castle.
- Play a round of Pictionary or try a new board game after a dinner party.
- Try a new craft together when friends come for coffee.
- Invite friends to make a big batch of food with you in the kitchen.
- Leverage holidays. Make costumes together before a Halloween party, sing carols and drink cider at Christmas, decorate and hunt for Easter eggs.
- Organize a gourmet crawl in your city—croissants, chocolate, microbrews, anyone?
- Turn a dinner party into a theme night—dress up, decorate, serve themed food.
- Go to a comedy club, trivia night or karaoke instead of seeing a movie.
- Ask friends to join you at a ukulele or tap dance class.
- Play at the park. Swing on the swings, go down the slide.
Your Unique Style
Not everyone is an extrovert, ready to join a team sport. Many people find pleasure in solo pursuits and explorations. But the chances of upping the pleasure and benefits of play comes from sharing the experience—even with just one other person.
Or perhaps it’s somewhere in between. Maybe you enjoy taking a class with others and then going home to explore further on your own.
There’s no right or wrong; just arrive with an open heart and a willingness to be present, and to see what happens.
